My life is in shambles. I have so much going thru my mind right now and I’ve wanted to blog but I’m in the middle of moving. I have a few minutes now so I’m gonna vent. Do you ever feel like you’re living someone else’s life? Like this is nothing like you imagined? Well I’m there. That’s what’s going on with me right now. Here I am a college-educated wife and mother and I am falling apart. Here are the things that are weighing on me right now:
- I’m unemployed. This is kinda the center of it all. When I’m not working and not bringing in a paycheck I feel like I’m not being a productive person. I expect to be working by month’s end. Even tho I don’t want my old job back, I want A job!
- My unemployment is delayed for whatever reason. Idk if it’s on the employer side or the ESC side, I just know that we are definitely struggling due to me not getting my unemployment. Soon my cellphone will be cut off and then how am I gonna get a job?
- I’m unhappy and very disgusted with my body. Being depressed about other things in life certainly doesn’t help. This is something I must change…I have blogs to follow on this subject.
- We just moved to a new place. Of course that has its pros and cons. But of the cons…moving to a new place without money is very sucky. I can’t go out and buy things that we need because I don’t have the money.
Those are just a few of the things. Most of you who know me, know that I try to be very hopeful and optimistic about things in general in life. It’s just that sometimes life throws curveballs and I can’t catch them. I just ask that you pray and support as I go thru these trying times. Honestly, it seems like for the past 2 years I haven’t been able to catch a break. When is it my turn to have things go my way? I don’t think I ask for much. I just want to work in a job that I like and not detest with good pay and a good schedule. I want my bills to be paid. I want to be able to afford to buy my children clothes and shoes and things like that as they need it. I don’t wanna have to sacrifice paying a bill bc my kids need shoes. I want to be able to buy something sometimes when my child asks for it. Especially if I really want to get it for them, to not be able to is such an awful feeling. And hell I want to be able to keep myself up. I want to be able to get my hair done from time to time, get an outfit, some accessories…something! I will continue to pray and hope that the Lord will hear my prayers and that we will receive blessings.
Ms. Ellis says
It hurts me to see you upset. I know that although times may seem tough, they WILL get better. You know your family is always here for you. 🙂